Just an excuse
by MindyMN
Summary: Barry was hiding something - he secretly loved drawing his friends. With his speed, it felt really easy. But when it came to drawing Oliver, he struggled with it on purpose. After all, it was a perfect excuse for him to think about the Emerald Archer whenever he wanted to.


_**Okay, this is lame and horrible, but I decided to write it anyway, because I just couldn't get it out of my head XD. I obviously don't know how to write one shots. All mistakes are mine and I'm deeply sorry for them. Enjoy :).**_

* * *

Barry Allen was hiding something – he secretly loved drawing his friends. Every time a chance was given to him, he didn't hesitate and used his free time for drawing whoever he wanted. Because this was such a normal thing to do and he loved it with all his heart. It didn't matter what was going on through his mind in that moment or how he was feeling. Drawing whoever he wanted always occupied his mind so fully, that none of his current worries or problems could bother him in that moment.

And his speed was helping him with this greatly. Because every time he started struggling with certain parts like noses for example, (god, he hated noses) all that was needed was just let the speed force take over him and his hands were capable of doing wonders. It always took several times of erasing and redrawing the same lines over again, which would normally take hours. And if he'd been normal, he would probably get annoyed and lose all his patience really quickly. Yet he was the fastest man alive, which meant he could do this in a split of seconds without any sweating. Easy peasy.

At this point, he had already finished multiple drawings of his friends and although he could hardly say he was proud of any of them, he still kept every piece of the work he'd done in his apartment, hidden so no one would ever find them.

Yet one particular person still hadn't gotten the honor of being drawn by him. One and only Oliver Queen. It wasn't like Barry had no desire to draw the Emerald Archer. He was just… taking his time and maybe, just maybe, he was struggling on purpose when it came to Oliver. Because it didn't matter how hard it sometimes was to draw his friend in the perfect way possible, he never dared to use his speed to quicken the process. If it was someone else, he would gladly do it without blinking, but with Oliver everything was different. With him, he was willing to spend hours, days, even weeks of erasing, redrawing and starting from a scratch. Because this was the perfect excuse for him to think about the Star City Vigilante for as long as he wanted to without questioning it further even though he knew perfectly why shaking off the thought of him seemed so incredibly hard for him.

Although he was doing his best to keep this a secret, eventually it didn't take long until Cisco and Caitlin found out. And of course when they saw how beautiful his drawings were, they just had to tell everybody they knew. Which included also Team Arrow much to Barry's dismay. And when the Scarlet Speedster thought that it couldn't get any worse, Oliver, Dig and Felicity showed up one day without announcing their visit sooner and marched inside his apartment to get a look for themselves. So yeah, in that exact moment, Barry knew he just wanted to die already.

And although both Felicity and Diggle praised him when they found their drawings, Barry still didn't feel comfortable by this situation at all. And when his gaze flew over to Oliver, he knew this was going to get much more embarrassing than it already had been.

"Yours isn't finished yet," he announced sheepishly, wrapping his arms around himself and came closer to the blond, who did his best to not look disappointed by that statement. "For some reason, drawing you isn't easy."

 _Please, don't dig into this further,_ Barry inwardly begged himself, but no matter how hard he was trying, his mouth just couldn't stop talking.

"I always draw you only when I have a fresh memory of you in my mind," Barry continued timidly while his cheeks were reaching a completely new level of blushing.

 _Stop talking, right now!_

"I mean I have pictures of you, more than enough in fact, but…" _Don't even think about finishing this sentence!_ his inner voice screamed at him, but Barry was just so nervous that listening to his common sense seemed impossible for him. "… they aren't much of a help for me. Actually seeing you for real and imagining you in my head is what inspires me to draw."

 _Oh god. You didn't just say that,_ Barry inwardly cursed and slowly blinked as the realization struck him. His already blushing cheeks became even redder. The heat in his head was rapidly escalating, reminding him over and over again how flushed his face indeed was.

All he wanted to do in that moment was just curl up in a corner of some dark room where no one would see how embarrassed he in fact was. But he couldn't do anything like that when the Team Arrow was still standing in his apartment and the man he had a crush on was right in front of him, thinking he was some kind of weirdo. Oh yeah, Barry had never hated himself more than in that moment.

Oliver looked at the brunet's lowered head and before he even realized it, a little smile started forming on his face and it stayed there for as long as he dared, because he knew Barry wasn't looking, but someone else was which destroyed this moment for him completely.

His gaze suddenly turned to people who were standing behind Barry's back and when he saw how Dig and Felicity were smirking at him, the small smile on his face instantly vanished and was replaced by a prolonged death glare. Yet that didn't help him in any way, because the only thing he accomplished by it was that his friends were now even more amused by the whole situation. And he needed to stop this before it would exacerbate even more.

"Excuse us," he announced to the speedster before him and left the room, motioning for Dig and Felicity to follow him. Meanwhile, Barry couldn't help but feel even worse after hearing those words. He had no idea what they were talking about, but he was sure it was definitely something about him and how weird he was. Now Oliver certainly thought he was crazy. Could his situation be even worse? He doubted it and mostly hated his stupid mouth for talking so much. Was he that obvious about his feelings or was there any chance that everything was okay and in few days everyone would forget about it? Yeah, right, even he wasn't so gullible that he would actually believe this.

After a few more moments he managed to get some sense to his mind finally and stop his cheeks from constant blushing. Now he looked more… normal or at the very least he hoped he did. _Not that it matters anyway. It was still embarrassing._

After that, it didn't take long until Team Arrow returned and broke the awkward silence which was ruling over the room the whole time.

"We plan on staying a few days in Central if that is okay with you," Felicity announced with a kind smile, which even widened when she noticed how Barry's face lit up after hearing those words. However, before any word could escape Barry's mouth, his gaze flew fleetingly to Oliver and then right to Felicity before anyone would suspect anything. These words just seemed too good to be true.

"Don't worry, we've got everything covered. Star City can survive few days without us," Dig reassured him as soon as he'd realized why Barry's smile vanished so quickly.

"And you can finish your drawing," Oliver agreed with a small smile, which finally put Barry's mind at ease. Even the thought of him embarrassing himself before had completely slipped through his mind, because now he couldn't help but feel happy how this was turning out for him. He was going to spend a few upcoming days with Oliver and there was a huge chance he would finish his drawing of him. So really, there was nothing to complain.

And Oliver was looking forward to it as well. Because yes, maybe spending time with Barry just because he wanted to see his own drawing was a lame excuse but it was an excuse nonetheless. And he was going to use it properly.

* * *

Those upcoming few days were really a blessing for everyone. Both teams could finally have some break and enjoy their free time together as friends. And Oliver and Barry could hardly be happier. Because even when others decided to do something different, the duo of superheroes used every chance they got, to be with the other one. Talking, eating, laughing or watching Netflix. At this point Oliver was so deeply in love that it didn't matter what they were doing anymore. As long as they were together, everything was great.

They could even spend hours in Barry's apartment, working on the drawing. Barry never showed anything to the older man, but Oliver didn't mind it at all. Because like this he could stare at the brunet for as long as he liked. Barry was so concentrated on his drawing, that he couldn't notice something so obvious. And Oliver was grateful for that.

However, their precious time was flying quickly and it didn't take long until the day Team Arrow would return to Star City came. And when Felicity and Dig announced this to Oliver, the downfall of his mood couldn't be any more vivid. Those few days weren't enough for him. He craved for more. One day. That was all he wished, because just another single day would be enough for him. After all, Barry's drawing of him was still not finished.

"You two can go. I'll join you tomorrow," he stated seriously. However, both Dig and Felicity knew what was going on, which was why they couldn't help but dedicate the blond before them amused smiles.

"What? Barry still hasn't finished his drawing," Oliver pointed out, frowning at his two friends who didn't seem convinced by that statement at all.

"Really, Oliver? You think we are actually so stupid that we would believe you want to stay here just because you want Barry to finish that drawing?" Felicity asked, shooting the man before her an unimpressed look.

"This excuse is even more lame than the ones you said to Felicity when she still wasn't part of the team," Diggle agreed with an amused smile when he noticed how Oliver wanted to deny everything but couldn't find any right word.

"We know you like him, Oliver, so why don't you just cut the crap and tell him the truth finally?" Felicity questioned, crossing arms over her chest, which left Oliver completely speechless. He knew about his feelings towards the speedster. He'd already accepted them, but he'd never dared to hope that Barry might feel the same way about him. Even after all this time, he still couldn't bring himself to be so naïve. Not when he knew that someone as damaged as him didn't deserve to be with someone as perfect as Barry.

"Do you know why he still hasn't finished that drawing?" Felicity asked, breaking him from his trance and stepped closer to look right into his piercing blue eyes. "Because he's being stupid too. He actually believes that that drawing is the only thing keeping you here and that as soon as it is finished, you will leave. So please, do yourself a favor and stop being so stubborn for once." And after hearing those words, a small light of hope managed to ignite inside him, which kept encouraging him to take this chance and go after the man he loved. Somehow, this same light had always been part of him, but it had never been as strong as it was now. It stopped his constant worries of possible rejection. It stopped him from thinking so lowly of himself. It pushed him forward and made him realize that it was time to stop with excuses. It was time to take that risk and say the truth for once even if he was going to get his heart broken in the end. Because for him, it was worth the trouble.

* * *

Barry was just finishing another drawing of Oliver, when he heard the doorbell ring. He immediately hid his sketch book and aimed his feet towards the door. Seeing Oliver behind them instantly cast a smile across his freckled face. However, when Oliver entered his apartment and crossed his arms over his chest, only then Barry noticed how serious and different the blond suddenly seemed. Like he wanted to say something but was struggling with it beyond measures. And Barry couldn't help but suspect the worst.

"Is everything okay?" he asked with a clear concern written all over his face. Oliver took a deep breath and without breaking his still composure took a few steps towards the brunet.

"I'm leaving with Felicity and Dig today. I came to say goodbye," Oliver announced coldly and Barry did his best to hide how disappointed he in fact was by that statement. He'd known it would come one day, but only now it actually hit him how desperately he wished it would've never come.

"But before I go, I would like to see what you drew finally," Oliver said, hoping it didn't sound as an order, because ordering Barry was the last thing he wanted to do right now. He didn't want to push the brunet into anything, but finding the right words had never felt harder. So he was stalking. And he could barely hate himself for it more.

"It's not-"

"Barry, you spent hours drawing me. You can't convince me that you have nothing," Oliver pointed out and offered the man before him an encouraging smile. "Please." And Barry just couldn't say no to the pleading blue eyes before him and so he reluctantly went over to where his sketchbook was hidden and handed it to Oliver.

He could hardly stop shivering as the blond was looking through his sketchbook, turning pages so gently that it sometimes seemed he was afraid he would destroy them. Barry tried to read something from Oliver's stoic expression, but it was definitely one of the most difficult things he'd ever done in his life. An occasional smile appeared on his face from time to time, but only for a slight moment. Because of that Barry felt like he was going to suffocate soon if Oliver stayed silent for longer. Because yes, he'd lied. He'd claimed that the drawing hadn't still been finished just yet even though the truth was quite the opposite of that. During these few days, drawing Oliver seemed so natural and entertaining that he'd managed to draw him multiple times and every time one work had been finished, he'd started the next one right away. Because he couldn't stop.

Oliver's beautiful face was the constant phenomenon in his mind and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop himself from thinking about him. About his smile, the sound of his voice and every little moment they'd shared together. And all those feelings which had been flitting around in his mind could erase every little thing which was bothering him. So how could he stop, when it always managed to make him feel better in the end?

"I knew that someone with super speed couldn't be such a slow drawer," Oliver pointed out with a smirk on his face, which broke Barry from his trance and caused him to instantly return to reality. However, his mouth was dry for words, so instead of saying anything he just lowered his head with an embarrassment and stayed silent. Until the blond decided to break the silence once again.

"Can I keep one?" Oliver timidly asked and watched as the brunet suddenly raised his head. It didn't escape his attention that the speedster was blushing, which caused him immediately to smile, because seeing him so nervous would never fail to make him smile. It was one of the most adorable sights for him.

"Y-yeah, sure, take whichever you want," Barry stuttered hopelessly and watched as Oliver didn't hesitate and showed him the one he wanted. And when Barry saw it, his cheeks turned even redder, reaching a completely new level of blushing. Because this one drawing was different from the others. Because Barry was on this drawing as well, smiling like the happiest man alive as Oliver had his arms wrapped tightly around him, which could still be excused somehow. But the fact Oliver was kissing his cheek on that drawing definitely sold him out in the end and there was no hope for him anymore. Oliver knew and everything was screwed… or wasn't it?

"No, anything but that one. It's horrible and I was going to throw it away anyway," Barry sheepishly protested and quickly took the sketchbook from Oliver's hands, which caused his body to shiver even more. Was Oliver making fun of him now that he knew about his crush? Wasn't he suffering enough? Apparently not.

 _This is your fault anyway. You shouldn't have drawn that in a first place!_

"Okay, but at least let me take a picture with you. Just one," Oliver begged with a pleading smile and the only thing Barry could do was just curse inwardly on how weak he in fact was when it came to Oliver. And so he reluctantly nodded and took the phone Oliver was handing him. He raised his hand and waited as Oliver came closer to him and wrapped his arms around him tightly in the exact same way as he'd drawn earlier. Something was telling him this wasn't going to end well for him, but he didn't care anymore. This situation could hardly become even worse for him. Or so he thought before Oliver actually kissed his cheek right before he took the picture. And when the realization struck him, he couldn't be more stunned. _Did Oliver Queen just kiss my cheek?_

"Thanks," Oliver spoke up with a huge smirk after he saw the shocked expression on Barry's face and took his phone back from the brunet's hand. "I hope I'll see you around."

After that it took several minutes of total silence before Barry could overcome the shock caused by what had happened. And even after that he still wasn't sure whether it really wasn't some dream messing with his troubled mind. But it wasn't.

Although believing that it really had happened seemed difficult at first, all his doubts disappeared as soon as he opened his sketchbook once again. Because a small piece of paper was placed right where that drawing was – a note from Oliver which said:

 _Wanna give it a try? Because I do._

 _P.S. Don't you dare to throw away that masterpiece. It's forbidden._

And suddenly, after reading this note, everything changed. He no longer felt awkward and embarrassed, but touched and undeniably happy, like nothing could hurt him anymore and maybe it was really the truth. He felt like he was soaring even higher and higher and no one could take that amazing feeling from him. Which was why shaking off the warm smile on his face proved to be impossible for him. This day had certainly not turned out as he'd thought it would. But he was thankful for it.

The smile hadn't disappeared from his face. It stayed there for the whole day. And the next day, Barry ran to Star City as soon as he could and gave Oliver his answer. He was done with excuses.

* * *

 _ **Thank you for reading this anyway even though it possibly might have been a torture for you :).**_


End file.
